For quite awhile now, my husband and I have been tossing a difficult decision around. We've been going to an amazing church for about 3 years and there are so, so, so many things that we love about it but, something is missing for us. It's been such an emotional thought to ever try a different church because we love the people at our church so much and the support that we have there is amazing. But still, we've known that we need to do what's best for our family. Our relationships with God need to be growing and we need to be where God wants us.
We've talked about trying a different church for so long but, fear, sadness and worry have always held us back. It's pretty easy to visit a church when it's just two adults but, when you bring young children into the picture it gets complicated. Paisley tends to get sad with people she doesn't know well and Judah can be pretty shy. The thought of them being in a totally new class room or nursery totally scared me. Then I thought about how sad it would be to not be with my mom and sister at church on Sunday mornings. We've been so blessed to all go to the same church for so long. Then God spoke to me and it was clear. Church isn't about hanging out with my mom, sister and other people that I dearly love. It isn't about being comfortable. It isn't about being where my kids know everyone. We're there to learn about Jesus and grow our relationships with Him. Also, it needs to be a place that is working for not just myself but, my husband also. When my husband and I have a strong relationship with God, we will be better parents and able to teach our children about God.
So, a couple weeks ago, we put fear to the side and tried a Foursquare church in town. Our visit went really well! Judah and Paisley were in their classes the entire time without many tears shed, the music was great and so was the sermon. We went again today and again, it was a success. I don't know if we'll continue to go or if we'll go back to our old church. It's a hard decision but, at this point, we are open to what God has for us. We might not know where God wants us to be for awhile but, I know He says "Seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you."
I'm sharing this on my blog because I don't feel like this is something we need to hide. I love our church and I would never say anything bad about it because it has so many wonderful things to offer. We are searching to see what God has planned for our family and I'm finding peace in that. Change is hard and scary but, the reward can be worth it!