Anyway. Getting back on track here, because this particular post isn't about two year olds.
Walking out of that office was a little emotional. I've had a lot of great moments in those rooms, between our 3 pregnancies, I've spent a lot of time there and I'm a bit sad to close that door. There's a possibility that someday we'll have more kids, but that's not guaranteed and if that does ever happen, I doubt it'll be anytime soon. Also, I imagine that if we ever have more, I'd deliver at home or at an off-site birth center, but again, three might be it.
Then of course, there's always the possibility that someday we might consider adopting. Even writing those words gives me that shaky, nervous, excited feeling. It's not something that I talk often about and really there isn't much to say about it. All I know is that God placed that desire deep down in me when I was very young and it's never gone away, even after having 3 beautiful kids of our own. It's in there and someday something might happen with it, if the right doors open and if it grows into something that my husband and I both feel like God is calling us to do.
I realized today that I'm not a fan of goodbyes. I actually don't even do goodbyes. I avoid them at all costs, sometimes unintentionally. On the drive home, I thought back to the first job that I ever really loved, when it came time for me to put in my 2 weeks and move on from that job, I didn't even tell a lot of my co-workers that I was leaving. I didn't want to say good bye, because it would make me so sad and I didn't want to even go there.
Fast forward to the job that I had up until 9 days before Judah was born. I never went back to work after he was born, but I never really quit either. I never went in to say good bye to those wonderful people, even though I should have. I loved them. That job was the best, but saying good bye didn't happen. I just couldn't do it. I had an office full of stuff there. Plants, pictures and all the normal stuff that people keep in their desk. I never even went back to get my stuff....weird, huh?
Our Pastor shared this verse yesterday and I just haven't been able to get over how good it is:
‘Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’
This weekend, we celebrated my Birthday with my Mom, step-dad, real Dad, sister, brother-in-law and their 3 kids. Filling our house with those guys was so fun. I'd choose them for family, even if we weren't related. My sister made the BEST Lemon- Blueberry cake ever. She has skills!